My chest tightened.
“You knew?! You knew what happened and you didn’t say anything?”
“I didn’t know what to do,” he rushed. “I was 17, Tara. I froze. I thought… if I ignored it, maybe it would go away. I figured that you had it handled, you did date the guy after all. If anyone knew how manipulative he was… it would have been you.”
“But it didn’t. It followed me. It defined me.”
“I know.”
“You helped craft an image of me, Ryan. You just twisted it to give them a nickname for me. Whispers? What the hell was that?”
His voice broke.
“I didn’t mean to. They started joking, and I panicked. I didn’t want to be next. So I laughed. And I joined in. I called you that name because I thought it would deflect attention from what I saw. I thought that it would take over and he wouldn’t say anything or give you… another name.”
“That wasn’t deflection. That was betrayal, Ryan.”
Silence filled the room, broken only by the soft hum of the lamp.
“I hate who I was,” he said.
I searched his face, wondering if he had truly changed—or if he’d simply grown older.
“Then why didn’t you tell me all of this before now? Why wait for this moment?”
“Because I thought… if I could prove I’d changed, if I could love you better than I hurt you… maybe that would be enough.”
“You kept this secret for 15 years.”
“There’s more,” he continued. “And I know I’m probably ruining everything right now, but I’d rather ruin it with the truth than keep living a lie.”
