“My name is Nora. I’m a registered nurse at Northern Light Hospice in Anchorage. I’m calling about your daughter, Lily.”
The box slipped from my hands.
Packets of gauze scattered across the floor like white leaves.
“What about Lily?”
My voice stayed calm. That was training. In an emergency room, panic wastes time. You collect the facts first. You break later.
Nora paused.
“Mrs. Brooks, I’m very sorry. Lily was admitted to our end-of-life care unit three weeks ago. Her condition has worsened over the last two days. She was lucid for a short period this afternoon and asked me to call you. She had your number saved as ‘Mom, Emergency.’ I think you need to come as soon as possible.”
Three weeks.
Those words hit harder than anything else.
Not hospice.
Not end-of-life.
Not come quickly.
Three weeks.
My daughter had been dying in Alaska for twenty-one days, and I was only learning about it from a stranger.
“Where is her husband?” I demanded. “Where is Colin?”
Another pause.
This one was worse.
“Mr. Mercer filled out her admission paperwork,” Nora said quietly. “He listed himself as unavailable because of urgent international business travel. He has not visited since.”
My fingers tightened around the phone.
“Not once?”
“No, ma’am.”
The little storage room seemed to tilt. The smell of cardboard, alcohol wipes, and disinfectant turned suddenly unbearable.
I closed my eyes and saw Lily as a little girl in yellow rain boots, jumping through puddles outside our Chicago apartment. I saw her at twelve, making me a glitter-covered Mother’s Day booklet that said, “My mom can fix anything.”
But I could not fix this from Illinois.
“I’m coming,” I said. “Tell her I’m coming now.”
I hung up before Nora could offer sympathy. Sympathy would have cracked me open.
I told the clinic manager I had a family emergency, drove home, and packed in thirteen minutes. Sweaters. Medication. Toiletries. My charger.
